Tuesday, August 14, 2012

The Same but Different

A Devotional by Margot Ciocco 
I was looking through my photo files this morning, hoping to find something to inspire me to write this post. I had at some point scanned in some old photos from my from my younger years into my computer. I noticed I still wear my hear that pretty much same way, not a lot of effort put into it. I never did care much about fashion or make up. There's that the same smile or that sparkle in the eyes. I realized that I still see that same girl in a older body. I still like pretty much the same things, art, music, writing. Still shy but fiercely determined. I saw the photo of me to the right of me at age three. I had just gotten a new puppy but I noticed I'm sitting there taking care of my baby brother at my birthday party. I'm still taking care of people.
I think that life has changed me, and in some ways it has but at the core I'm pretty much the same. Things that were important to me then are still important to me now. Maybe in some ways what I am seeing is that as the Lord is mending my heart I am realizing that he is restoring me back to his original plans and purposes. Frederick Buechner writes "Our original shimmering self gets buried so deeply that we hardly live out of it at all... rather, we learn to live our of our other selves which we are constantly putting on an talking off like coats and hats against the world's weather" I guess I've been digging out and uncovering that original shimmering self. God has restored a number of things that I lost along the way. I am truly thankful for the things he is doing to heal and restore me.

"The true story of every person in this world is not the story you see, the external story. The true story of each person is the journey of his or her heart. Jesus himself knew that if people lived only in the outer story, eventually they would lose track of their inner life, the life of their heart that he so much desired to redeem." John Eldredge

I think about the things that have always stirred my heart, art, music, writing, books, people. I suppose I have become more secure in expressing how I feel and how I see things. I still am wired with a desire to share the cool new things that I'm doing with others, just like the little girl in the photo with the new skates. I love adventure and exploring new things. I love being creative, my mind is always in motion.

Psalm 77:5-7 (NIV1984)
I thought about the former days,
    the years of long ago;
I remembered my songs in the night.
    My heart mused and my spirit inquired:
“Will the Lord reject forever?
    Will he never show his favor again? 
Has his unfailing love vanished forever?
    Has his promise failed for all time?
Has God forgotten to be merciful?
    Has he in anger withheld his compassion?

We can so easily loose sight of what the Lord is doing. I was reminded by the the prayer of a stranger who knew nothing of me but was led by the Holy Spirit as she prayed. God knows everything about me and He is fully capable of healing, restoring and setting me back on my feet to accomplish His plans and purposes.  I look at these photos that are separated easily by 40 years of life. The are the same but they are different. I'd like to think I've gained a bit of humility, some wisdom and probably the biggest difference is that I have learned to trust and rely on God. 

Well, I'm out of time for this morning. I'm not sure I have fully managed to communicate this thought.

Prayer:  I pray the Lord will out of this bunch of words and old photos, will some how speak to you that which is important for your own spirit to thrive and grow to trust Him more. 

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